Here's one important thing you need to understand, "Gender Difference" about how men handle breakups and women handle breakups.
Research has found that,
=> Men are more likely to avoid and push themselves away from a breakup, on the other hand
=> Women are more likely to obsess and ruminate about a breakup
Let's begin with the pointers that Why do guys go cold after breakup, Your ex is really hurting through this breakup you may find a common pattern develop, you can say
"The Pattern of Avoidance"
Have a look at the below pointers that Why do guys go cold after a breakup.
1) Unfollow or Unfriend - The first one is your ex unfollow you or unfriend you on social media but remember when it comes to men they are more likely to avoid the breakup as opposed to obsessing about the break-up.
So when you look at all these signs the common theme that develops is avoidance and on following in unfriending you on social media definitely fits that theme but what is actually going on in their head are they doing this unfriending or unfollowing you on social media
For instance, to hurt or make you angry.
I think more than anything it's not about hurting you and making you angry although I will not doubt that some men do that though it's more about them by unfriending you it's their subtle way of pushing you away because they can't physically push you away in the real world so they're doing it in the digital world.
Another pointer, they delete all of your pictures together on social media, here again, we stick with the theme of avoidance so rather than seeing pictures if you constantly pop up when they look through their newsfeed on social media or go through their profile they decide to remove the temptation of looking at any of your pictures together entirely.
But many women when they see that the pictures of them have been deleted,
a) They take it as if they are forgetting the entire relationship but more than anything is they're doing it for their own well-being, wasn't expecting that.
b) They can't stand to look at pictures of you two being happy together because it is hurtful and painful to them.
2) Distract & Avoid - Secondly, your ex is quick to anger again I want to repeat, many of these signs that your ex is going through a breakup or hurting are the fact that they're trying to distract me as well as avoid dealing.
Often times when you are dealing with an ex who is quick to anger it's because you're actually talking to them so they're not allowed to distract and avoid which is their common frame of mind on how to deal with your breakup, So they often will hit out at you because you again are the source of their anger.
Have a look at the below pointers that Why do guys go cold after a breakup.
1) Unfollow or Unfriend - The first one is your ex unfollow you or unfriend you on social media but remember when it comes to men they are more likely to avoid the breakup as opposed to obsessing about the break-up.
So when you look at all these signs the common theme that develops is avoidance and on following in unfriending you on social media definitely fits that theme but what is actually going on in their head are they doing this unfriending or unfollowing you on social media
For instance, to hurt or make you angry.
I think more than anything it's not about hurting you and making you angry although I will not doubt that some men do that though it's more about them by unfriending you it's their subtle way of pushing you away because they can't physically push you away in the real world so they're doing it in the digital world.
Another pointer, they delete all of your pictures together on social media, here again, we stick with the theme of avoidance so rather than seeing pictures if you constantly pop up when they look through their newsfeed on social media or go through their profile they decide to remove the temptation of looking at any of your pictures together entirely.
But many women when they see that the pictures of them have been deleted,
a) They take it as if they are forgetting the entire relationship but more than anything is they're doing it for their own well-being, wasn't expecting that.
b) They can't stand to look at pictures of you two being happy together because it is hurtful and painful to them.
2) Distract & Avoid - Secondly, your ex is quick to anger again I want to repeat, many of these signs that your ex is going through a breakup or hurting are the fact that they're trying to distract me as well as avoid dealing.
Often times when you are dealing with an ex who is quick to anger it's because you're actually talking to them so they're not allowed to distract and avoid which is their common frame of mind on how to deal with your breakup, So they often will hit out at you because you again are the source of their anger.
We've all heard the phrase,
"Where we have strong emotions, we're liable to fool are selves"
BY- CARL SAGAN
But really when you're going through a breakup your emotions are on a high level, there are so many things going on that you're obsessing and ruminating about the break-up, your ex is trying to distract and avoid. when you get those two forces together, you're trying to talk and make yourself feel better about the break-up.
Your ex is trying to avoid or distract himself for the break-up he can kind of lash out pretty easily because you're preventing him from doing what he wants to do which makes him cold after a breakup.
3) Purposely - Your ex purposely shows up to places that you frequent, now there will always be a certain segment of men who after failing to distract and avoid the breakup have no choice but to confront it, that's when they actually switch gears, start considering and obsessing about the break-up.
Most women now when this happens they want to find a way to put themselves in a place where you are frequent to but the thinking here is if they can manufacture a destiny in which the two of you run together maybe they will feel better about themselves.
Advice - The important thing to understand is it's all about themselves not about you that's kind of an important distinction you need to make when you're dealing with anyone in relationships. Most often we make decisions on relationships based on how they affect ourselves as opposed to what's better for the greater.
4) Obsessive thoughts and Cravings - We come full circle, your ex maybe has started out by distracting and avoiding himself from the break-up just like we have mentioned in our previous pointer, then all of a sudden they start to obsess and ruminate about the break-up, where they're gonna get lots of obsessive thoughts and craving.
They are going to blow up your phone that many times ask you,
=> Questions as well as Conversations
Lasts longer than normal, try to make conversations interesting. There are so many things that can happen when your ex is obsessing, having these cravings think of it like,
=> When you have a food craving often
=> When you get hungry for something
You want nothing else but that one thing when you can't have that one thing it makes you want that one thing, even more, it's a weird kind of distill breakups or relationships down to food cravings but in a weird way.
"Where we have strong emotions, we're liable to fool are selves"
BY- CARL SAGAN
But really when you're going through a breakup your emotions are on a high level, there are so many things going on that you're obsessing and ruminating about the break-up, your ex is trying to distract and avoid. when you get those two forces together, you're trying to talk and make yourself feel better about the break-up.
Your ex is trying to avoid or distract himself for the break-up he can kind of lash out pretty easily because you're preventing him from doing what he wants to do which makes him cold after a breakup.
3) Purposely - Your ex purposely shows up to places that you frequent, now there will always be a certain segment of men who after failing to distract and avoid the breakup have no choice but to confront it, that's when they actually switch gears, start considering and obsessing about the break-up.
Most women now when this happens they want to find a way to put themselves in a place where you are frequent to but the thinking here is if they can manufacture a destiny in which the two of you run together maybe they will feel better about themselves.
Advice - The important thing to understand is it's all about themselves not about you that's kind of an important distinction you need to make when you're dealing with anyone in relationships. Most often we make decisions on relationships based on how they affect ourselves as opposed to what's better for the greater.
4) Obsessive thoughts and Cravings - We come full circle, your ex maybe has started out by distracting and avoiding himself from the break-up just like we have mentioned in our previous pointer, then all of a sudden they start to obsess and ruminate about the break-up, where they're gonna get lots of obsessive thoughts and craving.
They are going to blow up your phone that many times ask you,
=> Questions as well as Conversations
Lasts longer than normal, try to make conversations interesting. There are so many things that can happen when your ex is obsessing, having these cravings think of it like,
=> When you have a food craving often
=> When you get hungry for something
You want nothing else but that one thing when you can't have that one thing it makes you want that one thing, even more, it's a weird kind of distill breakups or relationships down to food cravings but in a weird way.
It kind of fits because oftentimes food cravings are dictated by the chemicals released by your brain, as well as love, which is produced by the chemicals released by your brain.
So it's not uncommon for them to have these obsessive cravings over talking to you so if all of a sudden you see them start off by distracting not responding to your text messages, then they suddenly respond to every text message begin starting conversations by themselves this fits the fact a kind of going through some stuff.
Advice - Try and think positive, don't let your insecurities take over thinking of the worst thing possible. Try to be positive and make yourself happy. Behave a high-value way, just working on your insecurities, controlling your emotions in motion.
I hope you get an idea Why do guys go cold after breakup along with advice, for any relationship issues do comment at Games in Love and share it with others.
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