Healing The Voids Left From Unmet Childhood Needs

 

There may be a variety of qualities that someone seeking a relationship will be looking for in a potential mate. First, there can be the desire to be with someone who looks a certain way, and then there might be the demands that they have in terms of personality, Healing the voids left from unmet childhood needs.

Loyal

While a person's appearance will be significant to them, one may realize that what a person is really like will make all the difference. They will eventually grow accustomed to how they appear, leaving only their personality behind.

So, if they were to ignore someone's personality and solely pay attention to their appearance, they may soon receive an unfavorable shock. However, given all the happy emotions coursing through them, if they are, it will probably be months before they come tumbling down.

Someone with this kind of value system could place loyalty at the top of their list of priorities. They can claim that they want a partner who will be by their side through thick and thin and who won't betray them.

Unmet Childhood Needs

And the reason one is so certain about this may be because they had previously been with unfaithful people. They now understand how crucial this is as a result of their prior experiences.

One could argue that loyalty is a necessary component of trust in a partnership. For instance, it will be impossible to trust someone if they are with someone who is unavailable when needed or who has been with other people.

There won't be any foundation for their connection. It may only be a matter of time until the relationship ends because the other person is not going to be emotionally committed to it.

Another possibility is to anticipate the same level of fidelity from one's pals. They could assume that their buddies will always be there for them and be a part of their lives.

Unmet Needs Examples

Note - When people believe they are shielded from mental and physical harm, they feel secure. A person may look for partnerships with partners who can fill that function if they do not have parents or other older individuals to serve as protectors as they grow up.

They immediately and fervently fear losing that person once they find them. They might exhibit uncomfortable levels of clinginess, control, and insecurity. Others who experienced adult abandonment as children may have a significantly difficult time trusting anyone.

With this viewpoint, there is a good likelihood that the person will frequently experience disappointment in this area of their life. The bottom line is that their pals won't all be in their lives forever and they won't be able to count on them to be there all the time.

Even if someone is in a relationship, there can be times when their partner is unable to support them. But that doesn't mean that anybody they end up with will betray them.

Unmet Emotional Needs

Furthermore, there is no assurance that the partner they choose will stick with them for the rest of their lives. One can believe this if they were to be married, but in the larger scheme of things, it doesn't matter.

It is not simply about their needs when one is close friends with someone or in an intimate relationship with them. The needs of one person are different from the needs of another person.

There would only be one set of wants if, on the other hand, the other person was merely an extension of them. There would be no cause at all for the other person to ever quit their life as a result of this.

However, if one were to take a step back, one would probably realize that it is also impossible for one to have unwavering loyalty. For instance, it will be in their best interest to leave if they are with someone who turns out to be abusive.

What Are My Needs In Life

Note - Adults can develop a need for control for several reasons. Many are the result of terrifying situations over which they had little control. For instance, those who have experienced rape or abuse as children may struggle with control because they are afraid of losing it once more.

Even seeing a tragic occurrence as a youngster can leave a person with long-lasting repercussions, such as post-traumatic stress disorder and an ongoing need to dominate their environment.

Even yet, they can reach a point where remaining single is preventing them from moving on, even if they don't wind up dating an abusive person. Therefore, one is not being disloyal rather, they are attending to their own needs.

One may be looking at the people in their lives to satisfy unmet needs from their formative years if they expect them to always be there for them. Therefore, one is no longer viewing these people as unique individuals, but rather as their caregivers.

Unmet Needs In A Relationship

Their needs may have not been satisfied at all during their formative years, which left them vulnerable to a lot of neglect. As a result, they go to other people to provide for them what their caretakers were unable to provide because they weren't there when they needed them to be.

The other option would be to face their suffering and stop expecting others to provide for them what their carers were unable to. This would allow individuals to gradually let go of the need for unwavering loyalty from others, but it would be extremely painful for them.

Note - In that, it appears as a need to make others feel good, the need for validation is akin to the need for approval and praise. But someone looking for affirmation frequently needs more than just acceptance.

They have a strong desire to be praised, complimented, given attention to, and shown admiration for their appearance, abilities, or achievements.

Unmet Emotional Needs In A Relationship

Additionally, it is unlikely that someone who has been this way for as long as they can remember will even be aware of what is happening. Then, it won't be possible for someone to just become aware of what is happening and change their life.

It will probably take some time, therefore one might need to seek out outside assistance. Intervention is a good option if you or someone you care about appears to have unmet needs or any of the potential risk factors for developing mental health issues as adults.

Psychotherapists and other qualified mental health practitioners are trained to identify childhood experiences and problems that may be contributing to mental health disorders in both adolescents and older adults by using diagnostic criteria and a range of therapy.

Unmet Childhood Needs

Note - The foundation of many of the four major kinds of unmet needs may be an underlying unmet need for love. Children who experience abuse, neglect, or abandonment from parents or other caregivers develop the belief that they are not worthy of love or that they are unwanted.

If those unmet needs from childhood have not been addressed, we are likely to choose, at least subconsciously, romantic relationships that provide some affection and comfort but also push our emotional buttons, leading to conflicts, uncertainty, disagreement, and disagreements.

In the hopes that they will treat us better this time, we continue to be drawn to people who remind us of our parents.

Healing the voids left from unmet childhood needs, Unmet needs examples comments at Games in love.