
Stop
feeling emotionally hurt so when we get rejected seems almost obvious. There's something that
occurs in between the rejection and the feeling of thoughts, How to restore
my heart is broken.
Thoughts
about rejection, so when we get rejected or
somebody breaks up with us we begin to think two things.
Some of
you might not be aware of what we're thinking?
1)
First, we guess why they broke up with and then,
2) We
decide unconsciously that they must be right.
In other words, we make an assumption about what they think then we conclude their assumption must be true.
Living
with a broken heart or assumptions like,
=> I'm
not good enough
=> There's
something wrong with me
=> I'm
not worthy of love
Once we
have this negative thought about ourselves, once we believe that the air
negative opinion is true we begin to feel hurt.
We're
essentially worsening our opinion of ourselves, we were feeling good about
ourselves somebody loves me up with somebody or feeling about ourselves at
least.
But
when they reject us we have worse thoughts about ourselves those worsening thoughts create the feeling of hurt or the feeling of heartbroken.
The remedy for a broken heart
1) Stop
feeling hurt, in our relationships or in life we don't match one person's
definition of perfect doesn't mean we're not perfect just because we don't fit
in somebody else's hole, their definition of perfect doesn't mean that there's
something wrong with us it just means we don't fit their definition of perfect.
It's
just a matching of concepts, everybody has different concepts about what is
right or what is wrong, what is beautiful, and what is ugly. We all have
entirely different concepts.
So just
because we don't match somebody's definition of perfect it doesn't mean we're
actually imperfect and there's something wrong with us.
Advice
- Everyone has different concepts about what they value what they're looking
for and what they want right so we can't be good enough.
Those
ideas just existing as concepts in our minds they don't exist as facts,
everyone has different ideas.
Note -
Doesn't matter what anyone says or what anyone thinks because their opinion
doesn't mean anything it's not valid.
Mending broken hearts
2)
Different methods, strategies, and approaches that you can use really heal or
restore after heartbreak because the truth is there are no perfect answers
the truth is time doesn't heal everything.
We have
to try out different experiments, different tests to Restore broken hearts.
Strategies
that heal from heartbreak or heal the issue.
Sometimes
we focus on dealing with stuff when what really needs to be is the healing work
that needs to go on, it takes a bit more
time as well as a bit more effort.
Reason
behind heartbreak
a)
Cheating specifically it's probably one of the hardest breakups to go through
because it's one of those that sometimes are unexpected totally unseen. It
leaves the hardest dent in our self-worth, our pride, and our self-confidence
because we now are comparing ourselves to someone else.
b) Lost
interest, this one's tough too because you don't get any closure, you don't get
any answers you don't get any reasons.
It's
probably one of the toughest ones as well, this one leaves a lot of space for
healing.
c) Distance,
there's some distance it requires a different method of healing.
Remember someone, leaving you does not define your self worth it's called self-worth, it's not called other worth it's not called they're worth it's called you're worth, it's self-worth.
Self-worth's something only you can define, it's not defined by how someone
treats you, at that moment they start to undervalue yourself, at that moment
you may start to not recognize yourself as worth it.
Note
-Your value doesn't decrease based on someone's inability to see your worth.

Mended Broken Hearts
Short Term Method
1)
Negative reappraisal, thinking negative thoughts, or saying negative things
about your ex decreased love feelings but also made people feel more terrible in
general they gave rise to an unpleasant feeling.
When we
talk badly about someone, of course, it makes us like them less or love them less
but it can lead to deeper feelings of mistrust, deeper feelings of
pain that we don't actually deal with by just thinking badly about them.
Note -
In the short term it can lead to a benefit of reducing your love feelings, it's
not an ideal long-term strategy because it can still fill you with that
negativity.
Remember,
when you're fixated on someone's negativity you become that negativity.
Advice
- Consistently focus and keep thinking about someone's negative attributes,
their negative qualities, their negative characteristics, you start embodying
them in your life.
Fixed Broken Hearts
2) Accepting
your love feeling for someone else didn't really lower the feelings of love or
increase a long-term or short-term feeling.
In any other way, accepting the feelings you had for love didn't really cause a shift
either way.
3) The distraction didn't change feelings but made people feel happier so when you
distracted yourself from your breakup without addressing it, it didn't change your
feelings of love but it made you happier in the short term fixed my
broken heart.
This is a short-term coping mechanism because it's actually you're avoiding the actual issue, you're not really healing it you're not really dealing with it but you're just distracting yourself.
Advice
- Initially when you break up distracting yourself can be useful because it just
gets you outside of your own head.
Healing Your Heart
Long
term Methods
1) You
have to recognize and address every emotion when you don't give an emotion the
attention it deserves it actually amplifies.
Feel
every motion but convert them into labels articulate them effectively learn how
to see the patterns in your emotions and express them and explain them to
yourself.
Start
to grow and articulate your emotions to yourself, listen back to them you'll
immediately be able to figure out what the real issue is, what the real
challenge is and what's venting the anger and the complaining.
Advice
- It's so important to feel with every emotion to heal it because when you feel
it then you start to articulate it, you start to label it, and understand it
that's part of the healing process, the remedy for a broken heart.
2)
Learning from the situation, you have to focus on what you can learn from that
heartbreak or that breakup. It's so easy to focus on how incredible it was, how
romantic it was, how amazing it was.
A no to
focus on what we're left with, we like to replay the emotions in our mind, again
and again, it's so important that we learn through reality, and one of my
biggest lessons around this space is when someone shows you their true colors
don't try to repaint them.
This is
one of the biggest mistakes we make when we don't want to learn from the
situation.
Hearthealing
3)
Expectation setting, this is such a huge principle a lot of our love is based on movies, you can love the
movies but you can't live by them. The words like spark chemistry we expect our
partners to know how we feel without telling them.
Sometimes
we expect them to completely read our minds but when they can't we feel like
our love is not real we feel like it's not good enough. So important that in a
breakup or heartbreak we use that reality to set realistic expectations.
Advice
- It's better to have realistic expectations together than have false expectations
on your own, so many times a breakup or a heartbreak is a real reality check
our expectations of an ideal relationship.
Healed Heart
4)
Dependency when we have a relationship, we almost wrap our identity around our
relationship with that individual. When we no longer have that person we feel,
we no longer have that part of our identity.
Where
in being single in our heartbreak, we can start to improve our dependency and
community. we want the one person to fulfill all our needs and when we put that
pressure onto someone not only do, but we also push them away we now create a vacuum in
our lives.
This is
one of the most dangerous things to do in any relationship so this is a great
time in your life to start attracting the people you want to be in your life
forever.
Advice
- Start surrounding yourself and finding people who fulfill different things in
your life.
Use
this time to build those relationships to start new ones, start making yourself
whole, and recognizing yourself. Didn't just lose half of you.
You are
already full, you don't need someone to complete you, you don't need to be with
someone who makes you happy, you need to be someone who makes you happy and
that starts by building your own community.
Move on
after heartbreak is please wait before dating if you don't heal you bleed all
over your future.
Because
we're still trying to heal our past pains, we bleed all over this new individual that causes so much hurt, it causes so much regret and pain, wait
before dating to finding someone else.
Advice
- When you wait before dating, you work on yourself you build your own
self-worth, you build your own self-confidence this is your time to really
invest in yourself.
Special
Advice - It's so important for us to learn from that situation when we ask
ourselves what can I learn from this we avoid making that mistake in the
future. love is to feel and act lovingly.
These methods deeply helped you and are useful to you that How To Restore My Heart Is Broken, if you are suffering in the same situation just write to us at Games in love.
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